For the longest time I wasn’t able to figure out why I was so serious all the time, why I couldn’t come across as lighthearted and effortlessly funny like others - it was exactly this loss of playfulness that you describe
I’m so glad you did find out why, and I’m sorry this happened to you. I feel like it can sneak up when the stressors or trauma is sustained over long periods of time.
Wow, thank you so much for this. I knew that there was the concept of needing to rest one's nervous system, but I hadn't read much about this. Thank you for the comprehensive, insightful and helpful writing.
The information on how one is affected by chronic narcissistic stress fits me to a T. I'm going to print that paper and also the article if possible to refer to because one of the things that abuse affected is my short term memory.
Hi Pamela! You are so welcome and thank you for your kind words and support. Yes, there is rest and there is play and they are both able to happen when our parasympathetic nervous system is online.
Love this topic and this article, Claire. I grew up being told I was "too serious." Other children terrified me. Playing? I didn't even know what that was. I've had to learn to play as an adult and there are some wonderful suggestions and reminders here. Great to see you back on Substack, we missed you!
Yes I get being told you are too serious. I think motherhood knocked some old ways of playing but ushers in new ones. Still, it’s important to remember what ignites playfulness in you specifically. I miss dancing. So I’m doing more of that!
I've tended to blame myself for my anxiety and depression. I had a traumatic childhood. This post resonates so deeply. It's not my fault that I don't trust the world. Trauma did that to me. It feels really freeing. Thank you.
I came across this post magically. The word "play" has popped up at least four or five times for me already today. It feels like I'm getting a nudge to play. I went outside and played in the snow. It was hard because each step of the way I kept telling myself not to. Excuses to stay inside, doomscroll. But I did it and it was really fun! I made a snow angel 😇
For the longest time I wasn’t able to figure out why I was so serious all the time, why I couldn’t come across as lighthearted and effortlessly funny like others - it was exactly this loss of playfulness that you describe
I’m so glad you did find out why, and I’m sorry this happened to you. I feel like it can sneak up when the stressors or trauma is sustained over long periods of time.
Wow, thank you so much for this. I knew that there was the concept of needing to rest one's nervous system, but I hadn't read much about this. Thank you for the comprehensive, insightful and helpful writing.
The information on how one is affected by chronic narcissistic stress fits me to a T. I'm going to print that paper and also the article if possible to refer to because one of the things that abuse affected is my short term memory.
Hi Pamela! You are so welcome and thank you for your kind words and support. Yes, there is rest and there is play and they are both able to happen when our parasympathetic nervous system is online.
Love this topic and this article, Claire. I grew up being told I was "too serious." Other children terrified me. Playing? I didn't even know what that was. I've had to learn to play as an adult and there are some wonderful suggestions and reminders here. Great to see you back on Substack, we missed you!
Thank you Rebecca! I missed it too!
Yes I get being told you are too serious. I think motherhood knocked some old ways of playing but ushers in new ones. Still, it’s important to remember what ignites playfulness in you specifically. I miss dancing. So I’m doing more of that!
My grandchildren bring me joy and playfulness. It used to be my children, when they were little. Kids so often bring out our innate playfulness.
Yes my daughter does this for me too!
I've tended to blame myself for my anxiety and depression. I had a traumatic childhood. This post resonates so deeply. It's not my fault that I don't trust the world. Trauma did that to me. It feels really freeing. Thank you.
I came across this post magically. The word "play" has popped up at least four or five times for me already today. It feels like I'm getting a nudge to play. I went outside and played in the snow. It was hard because each step of the way I kept telling myself not to. Excuses to stay inside, doomscroll. But I did it and it was really fun! I made a snow angel 😇
Hooray for snow angels, leaving behind self blame, and rediscovering play!